There’s Something to Tell

As you all know I’m pretty open about my treatment and my Bipolar I diagnosis. I don’t always go into the exact medications I take. I also speak openly about my issues with migraines and how I’ve attempted to treat them and I think I should tell you about what I found that works for my migraines. Disclaimer: Let me make this clear, I do not use this migraine treatment as a treatment for Bipolar or anxiety, that is extremely important to keep in mind.

Okay, so at the end of September I was prescribed medical marijuana for my chronic migraines. I live in New York where medical use is allowed, but only medical. I didn’t go to get this because I thought it would be cool to have access to marijuana whenever I wanted. I got it because I felt like I was out of options. My neurologist didn’t want to put me on another medication since I was already on so many for my Bipolar. We tried gammacore twice, if you want me to go more into that let me know and I can write a post about my experience. The migraines had become debilitating. I would get one and I could not do anything, I’d be stuck in bed in the dark. It had kept me from going to class or going to other doctors appointments. So, we decided to go an alternate route.

In my state everything related the medical marijuana is regulated. I had to get approved by a doctor then I had to go through a whole process to get the actual product. The dispensaries are no where near my house. So I had to drive 35 minutes to an hour depending on which one I went to. Then I had to fill out a lot of forms, even though I had already been prescribed it. Then the product is not what you would expect. It is considered a medication so it has to be heavily regulated. There are several types of ways it comes, none of which is the actual weed itself. It comes in a tincture, a solution, lozenges, and a few other ways, but those are the only ways it comes because there is no recreational use. If you go to a state where it is recreational you can get edibles, like chocolate or gummies.

My preferred way is a tincture. Which is then cut with CBD and diluted. So it doesn’t really get me high at the dosage I take. It doesn’t even matter because I’ve only taken small amounts to prevent or treat the migraines and it has helped.

Anyway, this is probably the only time I will mention this on my page, but I thought you should all know.

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Fridays, Fridays, are No Fun

When you have heat exhaustion and can’t leave the house.

Now, how does one get heat exhaustion without actually going on into the heat, you ask? Well, apparently, when you don’t drink enough fluids or electrolytes, and sweat as much as I do (which is a lot) your body gets dehydrated and you start to feel horrible. (The science-y part is from my boyfriend, the feeling horrible part is from me). Anyway, I woke up with a migraine, I went to work, and the migraine got worse, I started feeling clammy, and nauseous. I was shaking, to the point where I couldn’t even drive home. So, my boyfriend came and got me, got me fluids and electrolytes, and had me sit in the cool and dark room. I finished my first drink, and the shaking was gone, I’m about half way through my second one, but the migraine still lingers. Now, when I get migraines, I pretty much can’t function, unless I’m sitting in a dark room with barely any noise. Which in turn means no work. Because of fluorescent lights and such.

I feel like I can’t even leave the house now, with out feeling like this. So now I’m anxious to leave the house because of mental and physical reasons, which is fantastic, especially on a Friday when I have things to do. Except, leaving the house isn’t really an option at this point, especially with a lingering migraine, on the tail end of this heat exhaustion. So, here I am, typing this, on my phone, because I don’t want to use the computer. This really sucks.

Friday, it’s supposed to be Fri-yay! Alas, not today. The last time I had a migraine I referred to myself as devils snare (from Harry Potter and the Sorcerers Stone) which is the plant that hates sunlight. It needs cool and dark spaces, which is me, essentially. Not by choice, more by necessity. I mean, I guess that’s what happens when you’ve had 5 concussions, suffer from severe migraines, and sweat so much that you’ll get heat exhaustion from doing nothing. That’s where I’m at now. Having a not fun Friday, but hoping to have a better day tomorrow.

An ode to Tuesday Mornings

Oh, Tuesdays…how I hate thee.

Well I hate Tuesday mornings. Tuesday as a whole isn’t too bad, but the mornings are rough. I don’t have a routine. I work half days on Tuesdays because I have therapy in the mornings. So, my weekday morning routine that I follow the rest of the week, just don’t apply, because an extra hour and a half is added to my morning. It is even worse when I wake up earlier than usual. Like today, I woke up at 6:15, which is fantastic. Especially since I’ve been having debilitating migraines, and when I have these migraines, I can’t stay asleep, and when I don’t sleep, I get manic. The migraines are the worst in the Summer, and I don’t drink enough electrolytes, so they just get worse and it’s just a vicious cycle.

Anyway, back to my loathe of Tuesday mornings. I just hate them so much. This post is just going to be a giant rant about Tuesday mornings. I mean I could just add some things to my mornings on Tuesdays, but I just feel like nothing makes the morning seem any less daunting. It’s 7:47 now, I don’t leave for therapy until 9:45, but I’m leaving early today to go to target. So I guess I can leave 15 minutes early, yay…it doesn’t make the morning any better. The rest of the day will go pretty well though, I just feel like the mornings last forever. Before I take my meds, I’ll have some bad thoughts, I’ll feel like garbage, and I’ll just hate everything, but that doesn’t happen any other day of the week, just Tuesdays.

Bottom line, Tuesday mornings are the worst. End rant.